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and as I prepare to say adios, I look up toward the heavens and send a silent prayer of acknowledgement for the events which have transpired in my life in the past 12 calendar months.
I think of my place on this planet Earth and of Earth’s place in this humungo universe and I am, indeed, humbled. A life time surely passes in the blink of an eye when viewed through the lense of eons of time and space.
And so I take a minute, a fleeting second, to sit still.
allowing thoughts to spin
where they will
until
they are all
spun out.
sit still
until I can
feel
the earth on which I exist
spin slightly
ever so
slightly off kilter. and it is in this moment that I
connect to this plane.
in the human heart.
I am proof of that statement. Earlier today, I took a quick walk up to the little market near the Attic. It has been a lovely sunny autumn like day and the air that touched my cheek as I briskly walked to my destination was ccol and refreshing. Ah, but I digress…
The purpose of my little jaunt was to buy some hope. Hope in the form of a few super lotto and mega million lotto tickets. 
I am happy to report the successful purchase of said tickets! I would be lying to say that these purchases have totally turned my day around, but it would be very truthful to say that on my walk home, there was an added bounce to my step that could be interpreted as an extra dollop of hope.
but sometimes 
it does.
At the risk of being considered a perpetual whiner about the same topic, I want to say out loud (again), or at least on this blog, that choosing to be alone is quite different than being alone, far far from family and friends.
Particularly after spending almost two weeks living with my daughter and her family. For that period of time, I was in the midst of a big family which included three young children. Lots of conversation, noise, stress, and love.
And here, at my recently cleaned Berkeley Attic, there is tranquility and a good vibe. There is even a vase of flowers graciously sharing their divine scents of euculyptus and the sweet scent of freesias. But, there are not the voices of my grandchildren nor my daughter, or a loving look from my partner to be found anywhere near by.
Good thing there is a “new year” to plan for and look toward.
food. 
Beans, that is.
on a day when comfort is in high demand. Actually my pot of beans are of the red and pink variety, sans the black eyed peas and pintos as shown above, but variety is the spice of life, right? Plus, I’ll be adding some ham that I will cut into cubes, some diced onion and garlic, and I’ll throw in some kosher salt, grind some black pepper, and add more than a pinch of cayenne pepper for that hot spicy bite that I love.
Since my dear daughter is not here to enjoy a big bowl of soup with 
, I’ll add more cayenne than I would were she here. But, I can tell you that I would gladly give up the extra spicy hotness in order to have her company.
oh, what the sun 
light illuminates
and transforms – when we open the window
and let in its rays.
I hope I open my windows more often this coming year…
Although my day tomorrow may have some of the fun times pictured above, I don’t mind one bit or at least I don’t care two bits, as I get to come home to my familia. So onto the big silver bird I will gladly board.
I got to leave work two hours early today. Score! There was a divisional holiday party and my supervisor let me leave instead. So I am almost finished packing and have already washed the dishes – before I would normally even be home. In fact, I would usually be standing waiting for my Bart train – underground, right about this time. Double Score!
Turned upside
down and shaken, hard, all around. I wonder if the snowman liked it?
Survived my office Christmas luncheon today. Saw my share of clients. Got motion sick on the Bart ride home, facing backward. New experience – the motion sick part, have ridden backward many times. Lovely.
We now have a new addition to the family, courtesy of the White Elephant gift exchange that took place at the luncheon. He’s a green metal and black leather, handmade alligator purse. Everyone, but me, thought he was too weird, and cover your ears Mister Alligator, ugly. I guess it is true that beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder.
When I close my eyes, I conjure up visions of holiday cheer. Nights made brighter by stars that twinkle…
Not
all stars hang out in the evening sky ~ and some of them lend their twinkling light even brighter when they fall to earth.
Twinkle, twinkle little star
how we wonder what you are ~ ~
There are visions of sweetness swirling about
in my head.
can you smell the tantilizing quiche that I will be taking out of the oven in just a couple of minutes? Made with farm fresh eggs (or at least that’s what the carton proclaims), 2% milk (from Happy California Cows), dark green broccoli, purple onion, humongo sliced just right white mushrooms, sharp cheddar cheese (yeah, the kind with the yellow dye which gives it that deep orangy cheddar look), fresh (from the Saturday Market) garlic milk curd, black olives, and pinches of basil and oregano, kosher salt, and fresh cracked pepper. Oh and don’t forget the ton of love that I magically sprinkled over it or the frozen deep dish pie crust.
Want a couple of slices of the thick hickory smoked crispy bacon 
I sizzled up in my frying pan?
I wish all of my loved ones were here to sit and break quiche with. But since you’re not, we’ll do our best to choke it down anyway 
.
So this morning I am doing the packing the old suitcases routine commonly known as trying to cram the most amount of stuff into a suitcase that I can without 1) going over 50 pounds or 2) bending up or damaging any of the pressies that comprise the “stuff” that’s being crammed into the aforementioned suitcases. Arrggggh!
And while I’m at, I am hoping and praying that these suitcases don’t end up looking like this:
or like this 
But lest I forget the spirit of this wonderful glittery holiday, it is very worth saying (or writing as the case may be), that I totally loved shopping for and discovering the little doodads which will soon be wrapped in bright and shiny paper (apologies to the environment on that one).
In less than a week! I’ll be home with my family!!!!
